Segway: Humanity's most expensive cheeseburger

At around six-thousand dollars, the Segway rolls in at a very expensive method of individual transporation. "It's green!" they promote. It may be green but at the price of your health. Either the Earth is going to flood and we're all going to die, or we'll all ride around on Segways, get fat, then die.

I was driving to school today (as you can see the dashboard in my pic) and what did I see? Two people riding Segways. What the heck. Honestly, what has humanity diminished to? Dogs are pushed in strollers, and we have wheels for legs. Can nothing walk anymore? What is honestly wrong with walking. We've done it for millions of years, and now we have to roll. No- not on a bike, your burning calories. With a Segway, you litterally do nothing.

"Lets go on a hike hunny"

"Okay, let me go get the Segways ready."

What kind of reality is this? Instead of walking through the park on a sunny day, we now have to roll? And walking on the beach, is that too much? In this new reality, we have to stay extremly thin and not move. What is this. If someone could explain to me why anyone would pay six-thousand to be more lazy, that would be great. I thought spending six-hundred for a Play Station 3 that had very little games out was expensive. Apparently not.

Segway owner John C. Hertig says "People are constantly stopping and asking me questions and chatting." Do you know why that is? They find you insane! Buy a Game Boy color you moron- its just as unbelievable (or was when It came out...)

Beth Goza said "the Segway PT will be used for any trips that are 'too close to drive and too far to walk'. The Segway PT is easier to use for trips to the grocery store or the cleaners, in which transporting a load is required." Mmmhmm. Well when my mom goes to the grocery store, she usually buys a trunk full of stuff. And where are you going to hang your clothes on that thing? You cannot even put a jug of milk on there. Dumbshits.

I guess if everyone who lives in a large city such as Vancouver drove Segways instead of cars, there would no longer be speeding tickets, and the pollution would diminish. It's not like your moving in your car anyways. Maybe they should make trailers for segways... put large loads and the kids in there. But horse drawn carriges are just as green!! I don't know, its way to futuristic for me, and I come from the suburbs (well now in the city) so this is all weird. Post your thoughts!

I leave you with this quote: "Put some "green" into your daily routine with the ease and versatility of the Segway i2 Commuter."

Love you lots!!!

Miss Kathleen